I was on the news! The experimental forest where I work in north MN (Anishinaabe land) was highlighted by Kare11 News. They visited me at my field sites! Quite a surprise! I feel very grateful and excited! The video/article focus on changes facing northern Minnesota under climate change. My field site is at the Adaptive Silviculture for Climate Change (ASCC) experiment, exploring different forest management strategies to support future forests. My own work centers on drought and stress responses, and whether these management strategies are helping to reduce seedling stress.

Check out the ASCC experiment, my sites and forest science at Kare11 News here: “Climate may change MN’s iconic north woods.”

Important context: 
1) The report/video emphasizes the “iconic MN northwoods” and fails to acknowledge that this is Indigenous Land and Aninisinaabe Land, specifically Leech Lake Band of Ojibwe. When the reporter interviewed me, I told them this many times but it was not included. Please when you think of this area, its past and its future, remember that it is Indigenous Land and home since time immemorial to Native Nations. Climate change and forest management must acknowledge and respect Tribal sovereignty, wishes, knowledge, and goals (which is also the aim of my work).
2) The report frames the ASCC experiment from the angle of its most dramatic “transition” treatment. However, the goal of ASCC is to explore many possible directions for supporting future forests. The somewhat controversial idea of “assisted migration” is only one of four strategies being explored.
3) Please respect and care for the land. I have seen responses that deny climate change, and this continues to be saddening. To that, I will say that when asked why I do the work that I do, my reply is that I have a responsibility. So please, in what ways you can, remember your responsibility to this beautiful world.
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Hello all! I've been hard at work in the forest for most of the spring/summer thus far. So I am far behind in updating. But I am excited to say that last month I was highlighted by the Northeast Climate Adaptation Science Center (NE CASC), where I am a Graduate Fellow. Please take a look! Thank you so much!

Some updates (May, 2016): Fear not, I am improving and my pluck is slowly returning. But, because I believe expressions of frustration have great value, I will leave the original post intact to reflect upon. . .

I have long considered a PhD. In fact, as I was searching for a graduate program prior to my Master's (a process that in and of itself was difficult), you may be aware that I considered the possibility of going directly into my PhD instead of doing a Master's. Ultimately, due to the combination of the funding situation and much thought and uncertainty, benefits and disadvantages either way, I decided to start with my Master's. I wonder often if this was the right choice, as I realized shortly into my Master's that I did feel well-prepared and ready to have been working at a PhD level. Nonetheless, I mostly feel good about the option of choosing my Master's, and that it has been useful. At the very least it has shown me beyond any doubt that I feel and likely am very prepared for my PhD. Though I do think, wistfully sometimes, how I would be half way through my PhD at this point had I chosen that route from the start here at OSU...... This summer, I thought a number of times about the caliber of my research, for example. Well, hopefully it was of a high caliber. Who knows. I have my doubts, of course, but the fact that I had designed most aspects of it, taught myself most of the plant physiology techniques, and managed things alone is certainly encouraging. Contemplating this in and of itself made me realize that, yes, I had likely been ready for my PhD already. But, my Master's degree has allowed me to sharpen myself, and has also allowed me to take some useful (and some not-so-useful) courses, and to work on my skills. That is all valuable. So it is.

In any case, my point is that a PhD has been a goal of mine for a long time, always just on the horizon. Something I've been chasing. In December, my applications were very precious to me even if they were few. I very deeply regret not being able to apply to a broader range of programs -- a regret you will perhaps understand more pointedly as you read -- but had so little time that I really do find it miraculous that I got anything organized at all. Regardless, I chose carefully. I knew there was much risk in building up my aspirations so, for each time I have done so in the past I have inevitably faced painful, stinging road-blocks or rejections. Yet, I have been told by many of my high-level of qualification, the depth of my experiences, and my value as a student. (All very kind words, to be sure, for which I am very honored! Yet, these accolades rarely seem to bear fruit, regrettably, and I am also very hesitant to believe them at this point). So I knew it would be a gamble of how much disappointment I could handle, against the chance of achieving my aspirations. Regardless, I felt some level of value in myself and my worth and my skill. I have worked very hard, and tried to do my best in all that I can. Likewise, I felt some level of confidence that I could be accepted, and I applied to an ambitious program with this confidence. A confidence, which, I truly do not feel is inaccurate or misplaced in myself. Even if I prefer humbleness, I will not deny at this point that I think I am very highly-qualified in my field, and I am proud of the hard work and diligence that has contributed to this. (One would think that confidence is a good thing. In reality, I have found, it mostly just makes things feel more disappointing. Again and again.)

Well, as I have learned, I might have guarded myself a little better against such predictable disappointment.